The review: While 1998's The Mask Of Zorro wielded a sharper, saucier style, this belated sequel is a family-friendly affair chockful of domestic squabbles and goofy sitcom situations.
There is also plenty of cartoonish PG-rated derring-do, swordfights and explosions (courtesy of returning director Martin Campbell), but there is zero bloodshed.
Note to Zorro: Your sword has a pointy tip. Use it.
But the biggest problem with The Legend Of Zorro - other than its preposterously complicated plot - is that it drags on for two hours, leaving it flabby when it should be fun, slow when it should be sizzling.
Thankfully, the cast keeps us engaged.
While looking older and paunchier, Banderas proves he hasn't swished his last Z - especially after being such a big hit as the thickly-accented, swashbuckling Puss In Boots in Shrek 2.
He still cracks a mean whip and is hilarious when he turns into a boozy crank and ends up slumped against an alley wall with his equally sloshed horse Tornado.
A plumper Zeta-Jones has some impressive fight scenes, but she seems to lack that fiery, sultry poise from the original that seduced the world.
Still, the couple manage to re-ignite the chemistry and are great fun to watch whenever they are squabbling.
Why the film-makers decided to separate them for most of the movie is a mystery greater than what a bar of soap has to do with the whole conspiracy.
And as Zorro Jr, Alonso is a great find - cute without being cloying, the kind of child actor who actually makes you wish he had more scenes.