Monday, March 03, 2008

My computer wiped out while Web-surfing

Ben Beagle mug

Ben Beagle

The aging, semi-hysterical retired reporter rides shotgun with the greatest station wagon driver of them all down the rocky road of life. Mondays and Wednesdays, steady as she goes.

Recent columns

Here is Old No. 36 with a sick computer.

This machine is 9 years old and this kind of puts it in the faithful dog category.

And this reminds us that even faithful dogs have been known to bite every now and then.

Listen: If your computer is broke, you can't surf up those pictures of a pregnant J. Lo.

I hasten to make the point here that I have no interest in J. Lo being pregnant or otherwise.

But I do like to see what the weather is like on the Outer Banks -- where our only begotten son and his wife live with two boxers named Cleo and Merlin.

Our only begotten son and his wife are always bugging me to get a new computer and I suspect the dogs agree.

I also get these strange urges to surf the Web looking for people like Calamity Jane -- who in no way resembled J. Lo.

I also surf the Web looking for Catherine Zeta-Jones and I don't care if you put me down as a dirty old man.

I also surf the Web looking for my checking account and you can't tell what happened to budget payment to the heating oil company if your machine is broken and these cheerful people on The Weather Channel are predicting an ice storm.

Loyal and true

I would like to say here -- again not worrying about being put down as a dirty old man -- that Heather Tesch can predict any ice storms she wants to.

Hey. I may look her up on the Web someday.

Also, if your keyboard won't work, you can't write columns -- a development that would no doubt suit a number of people.

It's not a good time when you have to take all these wires loose from the ancient tower and take it down to Computer Pros, where it always gets fixed and nobody bugs you about buying a later model.

There are bad moments when you get the tower back home during which you wonder if you can put all these wires back where they belong.

I mean, I wouldn't want to be around if I got the wires from the printer into places reserved for the scanner -- which I really don't know how to use.

That might be more strain that Old Faithful here could stand and the sucker might blow up. So far, as you can see, this hasn't happened.

Until it does Old Bennie here will remain loyal and true and give it a decent burial if the time comes.